Every good and perfect gift is from above

When was the last time you stopped and watched a glorious sunset? Drink in the beautiful hues of gold, rose and violet generously splashed across the cool blue sky, and hold your breath as the stunning rays move across the sky, revealing a dynamic masterpiece of changing patterns that can set your imagination running wild?

Recently, while alighting from the train at the Chinese Garden MRT, I was captivated by the vast canopy of glowing art across the sky as the sun sets at the Jurong Lake, and all I could do was to keep drawing closer to the beautiful view. Quite a couple of people were already clicking away with their cameras and handphones. I had neither, so I could only take mental pictures in my mind. But it was enough for me, the moment of reverence and awe was unforgettable. There were pools of warm gold splattered in the western part, as pink feathery clouds spread their wings across the blue expanse. The light yellow rays radiate like spokes of a bicycle wheel through the pools and pink feathers, creating a unique display of shapes, colours and effects. On the east, there were sweet pink velvety clouds hanging softly on the purplish-blue sky, like the pretty scarves worn by girls on their romantic dates. And as the sun rays receded, the pink turns to a richer orange-red, like the way some of my friends would blush after tasting wine. The warm golden pools changed to layers of deepening orange and red, as if there is a cyclone sucking in the colour and light from the middle. The pink feathers become softer and softer, like a phoenix coming home to rest in its nest after a tired day of flight. And Jurong Lake was illuminated with the changing lights, reflecting the heavenly performance in its own fluid and graceful waves.

Beautiful things like this set me wondering how can anyone not believe in Heaven and a Creator of beauty and order? How can anyone not give thanks that the world is not just black and white (ok and perhaps green for photosynthesis), with the bare minimum of air, food and water for life to survive; since by the law of conservation, whatever additional energy spent in beauty and glory, may be considered wasted and should be channelled into selective advantage for the survival of the fittest? Sometimes i think it takes alot more faith to be an aethist, than to be a believer. Because an aethist believe that everything happen over time, by chance and elimination, and then the whole world just turns out the way it is today, with so much order and beauty to behold. It's as if parts of an engine and metal pieces just fell from the sky, and miraculously a pretty, functional automobile was assembled by sheer luck! I find it easier to believe that there is an intelligent Designer and Creator behind every complex living thing, and every marvellous feat of nature; just as there is an intelligent designer and engineer behind every working machinery on the road.

As a biology student, i was always amazed at how complex a little cell--the most basic unit of life--can be. Even till today, scientists have not since stop discovering new structures, patterns and order in the cell, causing it to be so dynamic and potent, that just one cell is needed to give rise to a whole complex organism with multiple systems, organs, and tissues, all working together to sustain life and living instincts.

Recently, scientists have celebrated the breakthrough of creating the "first synthetic cell". It took 25 top scientists, $40 million (US), over 5 years, and a heavy dependence of super computers to assemble sequences from an already known genome, to finally create a bacterial cell, which is much, much simpler than an animal or plant cell. How much more intelligence is needed to create cells that programme themselves to grow, divide, adhere, localise, differentiate, self-defend, and even die? From scatch? To get multicellular organisms, some as big as the whale, and some as powerful as the lion, and some as graceful as the gazelles? Could these have all happened by chance?

A dividing cell showing the orderly splitting of chromatids (highly compacted chromosomes carrying the genetic material needed for each cell to run itself)--from Cell Imaging Facebook.



Yesterday, my friend showed us the ultrasound photographs of her baby in her womb. We were all so fascinated to see the child so clearly, even at the completion of the 1st trimester. We can see the head, the eyes, the ears and a little arm at its side. It is as great a miracle to me, as the sunset, and of even deeper and dearer meaning too, albeit this time, it's taking place in the little, warm, dark corner called the womb. My faith arose as I rejoice and pray for the little child, because I know God who has formed him in his mother's womb, must love him so, and have great plans for him.

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." James 1:17

I believe that every law observable in nature has a Law-Maker. I believe that every order that keeps the world going, despite all the pain, suffering and disasters, have an Order-Setter. And I believe that every beautiful miracle lavished upon us comes from a Mighty Creator who has set His heart out to delight us, amaze us, make us sigh, inspire us to dream, and pursue us till the day we recognise the eternity He has set in our hearts.

What does love look like?

Kapoked from Lightphoria :-P

Here's a song that gave me a glimpse into a different kind of love when I was a teenager.

I read a note my Grandma wrote back in 1923
Grandpa kept it in his coat, and he showed it once to me
He said, "Boy, you might not understand, but a long, long time ago,
Grandma's daddy didn't like me none, but I love your Grandma so.

We had this crazy plan to meet and run away together
Get married in the first town we came to and live forever
But nailed to the tree where we were supposed to meet instead
I found this letter, and this is what it said:

"If you get there before I do
Don't give up on me
I'll meet you when my chores are through
I don't know how long I'll be

But I'm not gonna let you down
Darling wait and see
And between now and then
Til I see you again

I'll be loving you
Love, Me."

I read those words just hours before my Grandma passed away
In the doorway of the church where me and Grandpa stopped to pray
I know I've never seen him cry in all my fifteen years
But as he said these words to her, his eyes fill up with tears

"If you get there before I do
Don't give up on me
I'll meet you when my chores are through
I don't know how long I'll be

But I'm not gonna let you down
Darling wait and see
And between now and then
Til I see you again

I'll be loving you
Love, Me."

I believe there is a love that waits and never gives up. A love that even death cannot tear apart. A love made possible by the everlasting God, Who is Himself, Love. A love that He has placed within the capacity of every human heart, that is sure, steadfast, sacrificial and unconditional. But unless we know that we have been loved by such a love, can we give it to another.

"We love because He first loved us." 1 John 4:19

Lord, show me Your love, and teach me to love Your way--surely, steadfastly and unfailingly.

What does God look like to you?

I came across this little poem in a little shop. It makes me smile in its simple, yet profound way and may it make you smile too :-)

One day in my thoughts,

I walk with you hand in hand,

You said there are things that you just didn't understand

How high is the sky...what makes it so blue --

And you said to me what does God look like to you?

And I said,

"He looks like a rainbow just after the rain

He is as golden as a wick dancing over the flame
He looks like a star when the night's crystal clear

He looks like a baby when mother is near

His face is like the moonlight reflected on snow
His hair is like a garden where all flowers grow
His heavenly eyes are as calm as the sea

You see, that's what God really looks like to me.

His heart is like a mountain so vast and so strong,

That's why all His children have room to belong.

His smile is the morning you are awakened to see --

And most of all, friends like you

are what God looks like to me."

I've often wondered what would it be like to see Jesus face to face in heaven. When we sing "Beautiful Saviour", I wonder if I can ever catch my breath while beholding the beauty of the Creator of the universe. Yet, this child-like poem help me to realise that Jesus has been revealing His beauty to me in daily little things that lift up my soul and make my heart sing. Sometimes, beauty doesn't have to come in grandiose and breathtaking ways, it may grow and blossom right in our daily paths, like the wild flowers swaying cheerfully in the breeze, waiting quietly for us to stop, notice and gaze in delight.

Thank you Lord for your gentle and humble ways with us. May we open our eyes to see and our hearts to rejoice in your wondrous gifts.

Power Promised

Picture of a rainbow taken by my old friend in 2006. It was a year of heartbreak for us, and I was just telling her, "Trust God, His rainbow will come soon." Yes indeed, it came, God's promises never fade.

How can I have child-like faith and wonder, even as I struggle daily in the harsh ungracious urban rush? How can I learn to love and pray unceasingly, even as I strive to survive among the pressing anxious neurotic work spaces?

It is easy to relax and worship in abandonment, in a garden or on a holiday, where there's peace, nature, and new adventures to be anticipated at every turn. It is easy to delight in the beautiful handiwork of God when you see the joyous glow in a child's face or immerse yourself in the stories of faraway kingdoms, heartwarming anecdotes, and worlds with heroes and heroines.

But the real test comes, when I leave the library and step into my office to face my displeased boss. When somebody needs to do what everyone doesn't want to do. When after trying for the third time, I have nothing but failure and mistakes to show. When after helping a discouraged friend get back on her feet, she took over my work as well. When the reward of doing something good, is to do something harder. When the news got worse and worse, even after I prayed and prayed. When I can't bring myself to get up in time every morning, even after trying for two and a half years. Can I still lift up my head; bless and praise my Lord; rejoice always; pray continually; and give thanks in all circumstances?

My mentor in Uni used to message me "Not easy, but nothing is impossible with God". And hope would arise in me. As I walked on in faith, I realised the power of turning my eyes upon Jesus, of pondering on His grace and mercy shown on the cross, how it can make the troubles and things of this earth grow dim in comparison. And recently, I have learnt more and more to put my trust and hope in God's promises, of Heaven, of His Spirit, of His joy and authorship of my life.

I've read that it is impossible to live the Christian life without the empowerment of the Holy Spirit. But I never realised the importance of this statement, until 6 years into being a Christian. Reflecting on those times that I fell to my knees, and cried out in desperation; I would realise that I was running on my own resources and thus was soon running on empty. I used to think, Christians must have things real easy and simple in life. With everything explained for them in black and white, and God always by their side. But as I continue to struggle to finish the bible, I realised how much discipline it takes to complete the bible and acquire basic understanding. And how hard I need to wrestle with God's truth as it show me so much of myself and the world, that I would rather not see, so that I don't have to change. To be humbled, to be emptied of self, to be surrenderred to constant moulding, to dare to love even when it hurts, or worse, seems to drain you out. Impossible without the power of His Holy Spirit, yet all possible and gladly willing by His Spirit indwelling our souls!

And because God has promised to clothe us with power from on high, may we be confident that He who began a good work in us will bring it to completion by the day of Christ Jesus. May we see His rainbow, even through the darkest, thickest clouds!

Life is brief but never fragile

Picture taken @ HortPark by colleague. Love the beauty of balance in a dragonfly and its readiness to take life, however brief, in full zest!

I'm used to saying the phrase "Life is so fragile", especially upon receiving the news of someone's demise. It sounds resigned yet poetic and profound. To me, it's a reminder to cherish every life and live every moment with my loved ones, to the fullest.

However, recently, a little book presented by my friend and mentor in church, challenged my thinking. It has a section called "Aliveness" and it says:--

"There is a difference between impermanence and fragility. Life can change abruptly and end without warning, but life is not fragile."

"There is a tenacity toward life present in every cell without which even the most sophisticated of medical interventions would not succeed."

"Joy is far less fragile than happiness. Joy seems to come from an unconditional wish to live, the willingness to accept life whole and show up to make the most of whatever is there. It has a kind of invincibility that attachment to any particular outcome would deny us."

--From 'The Little Book of Kitchen Table Wisdom' by Rachel Naomi Remen

Suddenly, I realised that there is more to life than the physical well-being of a person. Life is more than exisiting on earth, it is about being alive and present--body, heart, soul, and mind; more than the capacity to live well, but the will to live on and make the most of what you have; more than the possession of your faculties and strength, but the zeal to use them to enjoy every experience; more than knowing you have today and tomorrow, but the purposeful living to bless others with what you've been blessed with.

If life is less dependent on our physical qualities, but more centered on our spiritual substance, then indeed life can be the strongest when it is most hit by physical ailments and handicaps. Because it is through the weak and broken vessels that contain life, that the treasure from within shine through. It is when we see how someone can abandon the human self/ expectations/ preferences, to embrace life in the midst of suffering, pain and loss, that we realise how strong life can be, and how hard it is to kill its hope, when it has fully blossomed.

And it is a beautiful reminder to me, that life is more than there is on this earth--a far greater glory awaits at the end of the road, a glory that is of no end. Yet, like most precious things, this glory is invisible to human sight, and can only been glimpsed through eyes of faith.

"No eye has seen,

no ear has heard,

no mind has conceived

what God has prepared for those who love Him"

1 Corinthians 2:9b

And the last book of my favourite series of chronicles has put this beautiful promise in a more understandable way:--

"And for us this is the end of all stories, and we can most truly say that they all lived happily ever after. But for them it was only the beginning of the real story. All their life in this world and all their adventures in Narnia had only been the cover and the title page: now at last they were beginning Chapter One of the Great Story which no one on earth has read: which goes on forever: in which every chapter is better than the one before." --The Last Battle by C. S. Lewis

As we begin 2010 with the Author and Perfector of our faith, our life stories, may we set our hearts and minds homeward, on things above, and live His good and perfect will on earth, as it is in heaven. For He shall be our strength and song!

The Greatest Adventure is to Love

Recently, I watched a movie I really liked. It surprises me that an animation can be like the bible--shallow enough for a child to wade in, yet deep enough for the contemplative adults to dive into, and find many precious treasures for life.

'Up' is a simple story that keeps surprising me with the turn of events, and the change of hearts. The innocent love for adventure bridged the lives of two enthusiastic children and brought them into a lasting romance, amidst life's ups and downs. Even though the couple was eventually separated by death, the old man continued to cling on to everything that symbolises the enduring love and deep affection he once had with his dear wife and best friend. These included the quaint little house filled with her photos and many precious keepsakes left over from the life they shared, his wife's journal with empty pages awaiting to be filled with adventures yet realised since their childhood vow to explore and build a castle in the wilderness of South America together.

This reminds me of how much marks and prints we can leave in the homes and lives of the people we have loved and lived with, and vice versa. Often these come in little objects, habits, simple phrases, echoes of laughter and speech, memories intricately tied to and drawn upon by everyday encounters... What a difference relationships and friendships can really make to one's life, how they can enrich a moment, brighten a day, sweeten a season, and fill up a soul.

I remembered the parting with a close friend and room-mate in university. Agnes has become a very important part of my life, a big sister (spiritually and emotionally) that I can turn to when life seems to hit a dead-end, a friend that I can confide and laugh and cry with, a sparkle of hope and joy to focus on when life gets monotonous and dry. On the last day of our sharing of the hostel room, she bid her farewell with her typical warm hug, I fought back my tears, and tried to return the cheer. When she finally disappeared, the once cosy and homely room, suddenly felt so empty, the silence, so pressing, that I had to quickly switch on the radio, call someone and arrange a meeting to stop feeling so lonely.

Yet loneliness has become a good teacher to me over the years, it shows me what really matters and helps me to appreciate the people God has given me whether for a longer term, a season, or even just a short while. This is especially so when i start to feel irritated by the noisy slippers of my Papa, my mother's repeated reminders or the little requests from my little sister. Before i start to frown at them, i realise how fortunate i am to be able to hear them now, to have them right here with me, and before i can complain, thankfulness and the sense of urgency grip my soul, and i quickly respond in love and prayer, lest this moment of togetherness passes yet too quickly, and the day comes when i'll miss those slippers, reminders and little requests so very much.

Yet besides the theme of the bond of love and remembrance, another theme of this movie is about letting go and moving on with new strength and courage to love and embrace a new adventure. The human soul is never made to stagnate or be wrapped up in the past, no matter how good it has been and still feels now. It is about forgetting what is behind and moving forward to a new chapter and season; to experience, to learn, and to grow; to receive and to give; to love and to be loved. Because we know God is always good, He is always doing something new in our lives, and He loves us, as if there's only one of us to love. He desires the best for us in His divine perspective, His greater plan. So we can have hope that does not disappoint, for in our hearts, His Spirit tells us, we can trust Him and He will never forsake or forget us.

In the movie, at the crucial moment, the old man finally turned the "last filled page" of the journal, and discovered the pages his wife has lovingly filled in without his knowledge. Pages filled with pictures of their happy moments, the joy of growing old together, the delight of being there for each other, the depth of knowing they will always be close to each other in their hearts and souls and minds....and the last wish she had for him "Thank you for the adventure, now go have a new one!" He was finally released to live, and love, and seek, and fight, for the living and the hope, again. And this time, the new adventure for him, as the movie has it, comes in the form of yet another little child, in need of a father who is present, whom he can look to and look up to, and who loves him.

My mentor once illustrated to me the truth about life's changing seasons and the importance of keeping open palms. God may give us something or someone to love and to enjoy for a season, and there will come a time for Him to take it away, not to grieve us--though it usually will, but to help us move on. If we can learn to trust His father's heart and faithfulness, we will hold the precious gift in open arms, so that He can gently take it away and replace it with another gift. If we try to clench our hand into a tight fist or hold the gift in a hard grip, He would have to ply open those fingers one by one, not only would we make the whole process even more painful, we might also damage the gift or the beautiful memories it has left. It would also take us longer and harder to discover and appreciate the new gift coming in its place.

He gives and He takes away. Blessed be His name, for He knows the best and has already given His Very Best to us, forever.

Take time to breathe, to rest and to be

Why are so many Christians burning out? Is it because we don't get to laze at home on Sundays, and we often spend our Saturdays catching up with all the commitments we can't leave till Sunday? Or is it because we know our Boss in Heaven is watching us 24/7 and we feel guilty even just to stop and catch our breath?

Well, when God created the heaven and the earth, He worked for 6 days and rested on the 7th day. Even though He is the One who does not weary or slumber, He has set us an example to step back and rest and enjoy the work of our hands. Perhaps, it is not the frantic rushing in life that is the essence of living, but those special breaks--where we can slow down, step back, reflect on what we have got to do with God, treasure all that He has given us and brought us through, and give thanks for the magical moments of experiencing His beauty and grace in our lives--that are the true reward of living life to the fullest.

We should never skip our little breaks in life! These are the times we can catch a glimpse of the meaning and beauty of it all, a sense of the eternity God has planted in our hearts, a grip on the hope that He will make all things beautiful in His time. This are our true "star" moments, where we get to see our Eternal Father and Almighty Creator in our lives and know that He will bring us to where He wants us to be--our destiny in Christ. These are what that make all our busyness and toil, worthwhile, and bearable.

I have always wanted to know the very purpose God has for my life. But recently, on a little spiritual retreat with my church mates and pastor Andrew and Diana... I come to realise that before I can find the purpose of my life, I need to know and fully KNOW my identity as a child of God, a beloved of Jesus, a princess by His grace. Without a firm grip of this identity, all that I can try to do for God, is but an empty shell, void of true substance, power or sustainability. Only when I learn to see myself as He sees me, can I follow Christ and serve alongside Him with confidence and joy.

True worship can only come from a heart overflowing with love and joy in the Spirit and the Truth. True service is the overflow of a grateful heart that has realised it is more blessed to give than to receive. True healing comes, when we realise the Healer has healed us with His own wounds, so tenderly and completely, that even our scars, are beautiful in His eyes.

Lord, breathe on me, fill me and help me to be all that You've made me to be.